pain

my whole body hurts

but my right hand hurts even more.

esp the elbow.

fcuking pain.

so it isn’t good to be light and when people wants to throw you down the pool.. struggle real hard ok.. real hard. is better than you fall on the floor rather than they throw you down so many times and your elbow just hit the concrete pool wall and floor like fcuk.

pain!

thankfully i m a left hander..

sentosa & wavehouse

Sentosa was awesome with ting qi and adrian.

plus going to del mar to look for all time available Alvin

then bf was also there.

then slack till 8pm.

and went into wavehouse. and damn shit. i left my camera in my bag which is we kept it so i din take any cool pic in wavehouse. to summarize wavehouse party was great. thanks to apple invites. then we drank like no people business. and i got bloody hell throw into the pool like 93u593573489573 times till i lost count. and i sum up my party till 230am. cos i need to go home and sleep. nevertheless

awesome great and fun. ok =)

more to be updated.

sun tanning tmr.

wavehouse tmr night.

what more exciting can it be!

break break .. yeah

Body hasn’t been the best lately. Nose and eye irritations have been the worst of all. Coupled with body aches everywhere too ; just kill me.

and yes. my eye f- up again.

and you wouldn’t believe where i went last night. including myself. ok.

my eye got so red i came home on the bus like a girl that just go ditch or scolded.. crying non stop. ok. then aldrin came over to my hse and we drove to his hse at 10pm plus for him to change and off to bedok 85 for supper than to pick his friend. then we headed down to Zouk at 12am.

and believe it. we still enter phuture..

then the crowd sux. then my bf happen to be there too. then he drank alot. then i took care and accompany him. PS aldrin and his friends. and the other handsome hunks too.. just for my boy. and i can’t believe.. he friggling drink so much.. that ended up i left zouk at 130 pm.. stood outside and left the area at 230pm. just because my bf thought he oould hold his alcohol damn well like the past.. he drank alot but he wasn’t as good as the past. so resulting in him getting semi drunk..

and then sat his car accompany him home.. more like me sending him home.. and i cab home myself for siglap. wtf.

i drank. i dance. i did many things last night. and i went club with the f- pathetic red eye.

then i met my friend and we went for suppoer cos he drove his friend home near my area ring me up happen that i alighted from taxi so he came to pick me up and i went to eat with him..

and home sweet home.. and today thakfully i could go work late.. like 1030. cos of my red eye. and work at cpf was kind of torture when cases are coming non stop in. but i like it cos it seem to be testing my limits always.

dance was f-up i guess or what many people say. but i see it with another point of view. with short of one dancer. with the last min fire or attitude bad person.. without her. i wouldn’t be having a break this week. it might be torturing cos the proj deadline is coming and last min stuff happen now.. so is kind of building tensions among all. yet i was the only one laughing around. which is keeping everyone in amazement. there is no pt to sigh cos it woukdn’t solve the problem. so i rather i thnk of way to minimize the damage that is done.. moreover.. i m the producer for the show i m or should be more angry and messed up. yet i am not. so i hope if any of my fellow grp mates see this.. come on. take the few days break and rest before boss and i think of way to minimize all complex matters. =)

but then. my boy and me sort of become better. last night? i wouldn’t want to pin high hopes cos always when i do.. it brings no good happenings again. still i m delighted for having break..

quality time

quite a rather eventful day i have on Sunday.

i wonder how i split my time up so good that i manage to spend enough quality time with love ones.. and that start from waking up at 845am. thanks to alvin who really spam my phone despite he reach home quite drunk at some freaky morning time.. sucha great awesome friend. alvin if you read this..i am going to say you rocks ok. lol..

so i bathe change grab my barangs and cab off to pass the keys to chris and mrt down to Singapore River. i was still thinking cab down not.. then i thought off.. should be able to make it.. cos only 2 stops away from raffles.. then i mrt down.. but the worst fact is.. my boy race started at 10am.. and bloody hell me reach at 10am.. so unable to catch him.. so lost at UOB plaza.. ( lost cos i being super brave went to the event alone with no one accompany.. ) and trust me.. the crowd was really unexpected ok. totally caught me off hand.. then i started being very tourist again.. wander off to look for breakfast cos my stomach growl and i walk to lau pa sat.. and get myself food.. then bf called.. and i met him back at UOB plaza.. i bet he really din expected me to turn up cos i out aeroplane the day before.. and we din meet for 3 weeks too.. so i accompany him till 3pm.. by right it shd be 12pm.. but the lazy me decided to skip work.. so i get to be in the crowd of enjoying the competition. and trust me.. is really interesting being the spectators.. cos i saw 5 boats rowing in together and so excited who is 1st.. anyway between his race and warm up time.. thankfully alvin ring me up accompany me the boring time.. and we were discussing abt my r.s! it so confusing. perhaps is too long we din meet up.. we drifted.. so we became nicer to each other. maybe not for him but me. then he was afriad of me cos i was really determine in being my usual self since our last real talk.. so he din dare to say anything wrong i guess. that keeps me wondering good or bad. i have an answer already. whereby besties ard know. but i m still not saying. reason is …

then i took bus home but drop off at work still to settle some music issues.. then back home..

but being a good daughter.. cos i was not spending enough time with mom going out long.. so we went to singapore expo.. to SHOP!

john little sales to mph sales to food fair.

good deals..

and pls don’t say i m selfish again.

ladies. charles and keith are having sales at john little expo sales.. ask me where did i get my previous 2 gorgeous heals.. yeah. when i tell them i gt it at charles and keith.. they nag saying C & K shoes are sometime pricey now.. but when i say i gt it at 12.90 or 16.90 or 19.90.. trust me girls wanted to kill me..

reach home.. drop dead.. straight.

cos the night before. i reach home at 4am.. going for supper with ken and after it coffee with drin and ken. thats why.

and i am still recovering kind of slow. argh.

sick. club. dance.

the horrible me finally return to work after 2 days of sick leave.

seriously 2 days of staying home completely. eating, taking medicine, surf the net till i feel drowsy then eat again sleep again.. the whole cycle just repeats for 2 days.. it seems like more than 2 friggling days.. ok.. and when i return to work on thursday.. before i could step into the office or tap my pass into it.. i saw my colleagues complaining that the team gt influx… then my mood started to drop.. cos it means more work.. then when i step into the office.. people started telling me.. 2 days of MC for me seems like 1 week cos i slim down again. ( kind of unhappy cos i don’t want to slim down anymore) then i begin slogging myself at work for 2 days.. and returning to dance as usual..

and i learnt never to fall sick at the wrong time. ok..

and ps. i hope i stop slimming down cos i can’t fcuking fit all my jeans now. it going to be a waste.. even 25inch of skinny jeans now i can’t even wear it as a low waist jeans now. i need a fcuking belt to hold it there.. this is so not good. i eat alot but still not gaining the weight back. whats happening??? dcotor claims that my body is too tired thats why my weight is going down.. so he advise my mom just let her eat what she wants don’t stop as long as she has appetite.. and last night dinner.. i just had 2 packets of maggie mee.. a good sign.

i should be appearing at someone competition right now.. but still i m stuck at some corner in singapore working and dancing.. nevertheless i hope the team does well.

and is Sat again. i am getting the urge to party again. ( which is nt very good!! ) anyway beside me.. i found out that majority of my peeps in dance also spend their weekend in club.. despite we might be spending 3/4 of our time dancing but in club we finally could put down the usual self and relax and chill.. getting the right souls back into the body.  i am still in a dilema where shd i go to. cos either side i go i know there will be lots of funny stuffs. dbl o or power house. majority of my cliques are well attached unlike me.. so they spend quality time with their partners doing quality stuffs.. so ended up i always club with outside friends with their friend then friend friend.. and the group just get bigger and you can’t remember their name.. and the next time they see you they call you and you just stare into blank saying i forget your name.. full of embarrassment.. =)

which it happen last week at power house. i met zb friends whom some i met at dbl o.. but the problem is too many guys till i can’t remember their name except their faces.

many people been dropping message to me asking how my current relationship. ok. it messed up. i don’t even have the time to make a fugly phone call now.. cos i spend day working.. night working.. home eating bathe sleep.. even if i have the time to make the call.. i tell you what.. my voice sux still.. ok… that when i open my mouth.. goodness sake.. i felt that a guy is talking.. lol… i drank many water.. avoided cold drinks.. yet.. useless..and i’m still on medication.. the first time i m so obedient taking them for so long..

moreover.. my partner nv even bother to msg me.. so i kind of given up..

told you relationship more of a hassle.. and then i still tangle myself into it..

i did my best for what i could.

so even if the results is not an expected one.

yet i have no regrets.

for i have already done what i could is just time doesn’t allows everything to fit in now.

if people has comments over my attitude then well. i don’t give a bloody hell damn.

just like what i said

I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle.
But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.

we don’t live for another. we live for ourselves.

be it work, studies, relationships.

i hold my thoughts to this in my life.

cos i’m stephy

so ps. stop asking me about whats happening cos i have said what i need to said. i hate repeating myself. tsk

resting home still. gotten 2 days of MC so i could finally be freed from work and everything.

when was the last time you gotten such good break?

now i do believe breaks are really essential to me. been rushing like hell madness for work, dance, relationships and many others. my body need a good rest. after 2 days of recharging of battery in my body.. i guess tmr when i return to the world again i am able to continue my work.

getting sick was kind of bad really.. bad fever, flu cough sore throat.. cos it makes my whole body drain off.

yet falling sick was not really that bad. i have my great mom to take care of me.. prepare food for me.. making sure i was alright. then i had good friends who msg me and call me daily to make sure i am recovering well.. i feel so pampered afterall =)

and where is my bf. yes. dun ask me. i have no idea. where everyone is telling me to rest well.. i msg him telling him i can’t call him cos of my throat he din replied. and when the day before i call him despite sore throat.. and wanting to hang up cos i was super not well.. he din allow me to hang up only till i say i sleep 3 hrs daily leh.. then he finally hang up. how stupid it is.. 2 bloody hell mths last night. this 2nd mth was not a good mth. cos it was a mth full of arguments that i gave up.

i totally have no more energy to deal with such matters anymore.

i thought i was the one that was ridiculous at times. and every relationship i always believe both parties to have fault so i tried myvery best to make up.. but now i realize.. i was right from the beginning. is not me being messed up. the part of me trying to make up is all wrong. cos it only allows the matter to worsen. so prob after what had happen.. i know what’s going on..

there is no more affections between us.

the game is calling off..

i suppose.

rest assure. i m alright.

ciaos. i need to go to take my nap

drag myself to see a doctor today.

more like my mom drag me out of bed and bring me to visit the doctor.

kind of a bad cold now.

lousy me still falling sick

the past 2 days were like better than today when i went back for work. boooo.. worst.. damn irritating. forcing me to see a doctor soon.

had a great weekend despite it was busy.. dance work was awesome cos at least i completed half of the work already.. thanks to the people who help and coordinate with my last min hectic time.  a million of thanks to the really. prob now i left with my last finale which i need to do some research online cos i wanted to try sth different that i nv try before. kind of a risk yet i know bosses are supporting me. despite they nag and scold me everyday yet they help me, get me food, buy me snacks, provide me all assistance always.

and i finally spend my levis 100 bucks voucher. i gt a grey jeans wanted a light blue color but i can’t find it.. so i gave up walking ard different levis.. cos voucher expire today.. so drin drove me to town to get my levis jeans.. suppose to be a 179.90 jeans so after 100 rebate i gt to pay 79.90 and now there a 50 bucks old jeans discount.. i pay 29.9.. kind of cool.. cos i nv buy levis with my own $$ like many ages already.. and the staffs are kind enough they let me pay 29.90 and tell me to bring my own jeans back anytime cos i din know wiht voucher i m still entitle further discount.. hahahaaha.. great man!

after shopping drin left us to have a date so leaving tingy n me alone in town.. so we were walking ard to look for vicky birthday present.. and very last min i gt pulled down to power house to party for vicky.. and i met people there again. and crowd sux really. what the use of member and guest list where we still need to wait for 1 hr.. then baggage sux cos i need to baggage at the boiler thanks to my friend who told me and brought me there if not i m stuck with where shd my bag goes to.. then party till late night and drin came to fetch me home. tingy was drunk kind of sad.

slept 3 hrs and went for dance work again. trust me i became more energetic when it comes to dance.. cos i gt wad i wanted for my last dance. so i was working damn hard. and went for vicky actual birthday party at ice cube cafe at 6 plus.. thankfully i get to leave studio for dinner break so i could go down for her birthday. gt her a french connection watch which tingy n me walked like hell to buy and decide.. then met my friend for dinner to discuss some things..

and thats it.

this morning i woke up.

when i board the damn hell bus..

i know shit.. my flu worsen.

pls help